Wazzuup?? I missed you guys! I have so much reading to catch up on now!!
Well, I promised I would write about our boot camp experience when we were through, so here it is, in short form.
Waaaayy to much to write about every detail of every day, so these are just the basics.
Just like every DD relationship is different, just like every couple have different DD rules, we think that DD boot camp structure and rules should be just as personalized.
Hubby had a week of vacation he needed to take, so instead of actually going away somewhere, we decided to stay home, work on us, and nurture TTWD.
We decided to do it for 3 days. To work on my 3 particular weaknesses.
Day 1 was devoted to submission. (actually all 3 days were devoted to submission, but the "focus" of each day was different).
Day 2 was focused on my spending.
Day 3 was focused on my potty mouth.
Each day started at 9 a.m. and ended at 6 p.m. (trust me, that's long enough)
The structure of our boot camp was 4 scheduled spankings a day, and 4 homework assignments a day, with additional spankings for broken rules through out the day.
The purpose of the spankings were for me to completely submit, completely trust, and completely obey with no questions asked,.......... and to bring me out of my comfort zone.
I don't know why........ but when I'm told to do something, I automatically turn into a 5 year old full of questions...."why?....what's gonna happen?........ where are we going??........ what are you doing??"
If I have to ask questions instead of just doing what I'm told, then I am not truly submitting. I'm not fully trusting him.
That's my way of still having some control.
The spankings were given, spread out through the day, and had different severities, which were meant to show me that no matter how bad any of them were............. they may hurt................. but I will never be hurt.
That was the trust part.
They were done in different positions and different places, to bring me out of my comfort zone........ that I actually found sort of erotic.
My 4 homework assignments were questions my hubby set out for me to answer in written form, all of which had to be done immediately following the scheduled spankings, and I had to sit on my still-sore-bottom on a hard kitchen stool while I wrote.
The questions were geared toward whatever we were focusing on that day.
Like on day 1, focus on submission, my homework questions were "Why is it important that I submit to my husband?"............... "Why do I find it so hard to submit to my husband?".......................... "What can my husband do to help me be more submissive?"............... then my last homework assignment for the day was to write in my journal about how I felt about everything that happened that day.
It was very insightful, because I can express myself better in writing than verbally, so some of my answers were really helpful to both of us.
Through out each day I had a few extra rules to follow. Those were harder than I thought.
I had to ask permission to do everything. He made every choice and decision for me. That was to focus on true submission, and also for me to see how much freedom I have on a day to day basis.
I was not his slave, because that's not how we roll, but if I forgot to ask before I just did something, that was an immediate spanking. Quick, hard and to-the-point.
During these 3 days, I could not question anything he said or asked of me, and if I stalled in doing anything he asked or showed any defiance, that was another immediate spanking.
This boot camp business is not for the faint of heart. It was physically and emotionally draining.
By the middle of day 2, I was in tears and wanted to quit because my bottom was so sore and I just wanted to go back to doing what I wanted to do.
But then, we sat and talked and loved and discovered that we were more connected, and that I was trusting him on a deeper level................. We spent every second of those 3 days together................. We drew strength from each other.
This boot camp helped him too.
It helped him to step up, and follow through even when he didn't want to.
He had to watch me and stay on top of things constantly.
He couldn't slack....... he had to put a lot of thought into every day......... making the rules............ planning the homework assignments............. planning the scheduled spankings.
We made it through.
We're more connected.
We're stronger than before.
I have realized that the respect and submission I give him on a daily basis shouldn't be as hard as I make it.
I have realized that his job as my HOH is not an easy one. I wouldn't want his job.
And he deserves every bit of submission and respect that I give him, and then some.
All in all, it was a good experience.....but one that I don't want to do again for a loooonnggggggg time!!