Friday, November 4, 2011

BACK FROM BOOTCAMP

Wazzuup?? I missed you guys! I have so much reading to catch up on now!!

Well, I promised I would write about our boot camp experience when we were through, so here it is, in short form.

Waaaayy to much to write about every detail of every day, so these are just the basics.



Just like every DD relationship is different, just like every couple have different DD rules, we think that DD boot camp structure and rules should be just as personalized.


Hubby had a week of vacation he needed to take, so instead of actually going away somewhere, we decided to stay home, work on us, and nurture TTWD.


We decided to do it for 3 days. To work on my 3 particular weaknesses.

Day 1 was devoted to submission. (actually all 3 days were devoted to submission, but the "focus" of each day was different).

Day 2 was focused on my spending.

Day 3 was focused on my potty mouth.

Each day started at 9 a.m. and ended at 6 p.m. (trust me, that's long enough)

The structure of our boot camp was 4 scheduled spankings a day, and 4 homework assignments a day, with additional spankings for broken rules through out the day.

The purpose of the spankings were for me to completely submit, completely trust, and completely obey with no questions asked,.......... and to bring me out of my comfort zone.

I don't know why........ but when I'm told to do something, I automatically turn into a 5 year old full of questions...."why?....what's gonna happen?........ where are we going??........ what are you doing??"



If I have to ask questions instead of just doing what I'm told, then I am not truly submitting. I'm not fully trusting him.

That's my way of still having some control.



The spankings were given, spread out through the day, and had different severities, which were meant to show me that no matter how bad any of them were............. they may hurt................. but I will never be hurt.

That was the trust part.

They were done in different positions and different places, to bring me out of my comfort zone........ that I actually found sort of erotic.



My 4 homework assignments were questions my hubby set out for me to answer in written form, all of which had to be done immediately following the scheduled spankings, and I had to sit on my still-sore-bottom on a hard kitchen stool while I wrote.




The questions were geared toward whatever we were focusing on that day.



Like on day 1, focus on submission, my homework questions were "Why is it important that I submit to my husband?"............... "Why do I find it so hard to submit to my husband?".......................... "What can my husband do to help me be more submissive?"............... then my last homework assignment for the day was to write in my journal about how I felt about everything that happened that day.

It was very insightful, because I can express myself better in writing than verbally, so some of my answers were really helpful to both of us.

Through out each day I had a few extra rules to follow. Those were harder than I thought.



I had to ask permission to do everything. He made every choice and decision for me. That was to focus on true submission, and also for me to see how much freedom I have on a day to day basis.



I was not his slave, because that's not how we roll, but if I forgot to ask before I just did something, that was an immediate spanking. Quick, hard and to-the-point.



During these 3 days, I could not question anything he said or asked of me, and if I stalled in doing anything he asked or showed any defiance, that was another immediate spanking.



This boot camp business is not for the faint of heart. It was physically and emotionally draining.



By the middle of day 2, I was in tears and wanted to quit because my bottom was so sore and I just wanted to go back to doing what I wanted to do.



But then, we sat and talked and loved and discovered that we were more connected, and that I was trusting him on a deeper level................. We spent every second of those 3 days together................. We drew strength from each other.



This boot camp helped him too.

 It helped him to step up, and follow through even when he didn't want to.

He had to watch me and stay on top of things constantly.

He couldn't slack....... he had to put a lot of thought into every day......... making the rules............ planning the homework assignments............. planning the scheduled spankings.







We made it through.

Together.

We're more connected.

We're stronger than before.

I have realized that the respect and submission I give him on a daily basis shouldn't be as hard as I make it.

I have realized that his job as my HOH is not an easy one. I wouldn't want his job.

And he deserves every bit of submission and respect that I give him, and then some.

All in all, it was a good experience.....but one that I don't want to do again for a loooonnggggggg time!!


Princess xoxo


14 comments:

  1. Wow... that is intense!! I'm so glad that you both came out on the other side better and stronger and closer!! How fabulous... but I don't see us doing this anytime soon!! *hugs*

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  2. Thanks so much for sharing. It's neat to see how different couples handle their relationships.

    Your poor, poor bottom! That's a LOT of spankings.

    Love,
    Kitty

    P.S. I'm so happy for you and your hubby being closer after going through boot camp!

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  3. Wow! Firstly well done for getting through it :) I read this post with great interest, I'm not sure I'll be doing this anytime soon either but I like hearing about others experiences with it. It sounds like it does the job it's intended to do. It sounds very intense but who wouldn't wan the end results :))
    Oh, and well done on your month mark :))

    Dee x

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  4. Thanks for posting! The general consensus is that it's very intense...and it works! Three days though, wow! :)

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  5. Mikki~ yes it was intense, and I've got a love/hate relationship with boot camp. I loved how involved and close we had to stay the entire time, but hated constantly being under the microscope and having to ask permission for everything!

    Kitty~ yes, my poor poor bottom indeed! my bottom agrees with you 100%:) But my heart says it was worth it<3

    Dee~ Thanks! I'm pretty proud of not smoking for a month, but ya know...even after all that time...I STILL want a cigarette about 2 times a day. But I just chew the heck out of gum and the craving eventually goes away. Oh if only I didn't love it so much!!

    and yes, boot camp did what it was supposed too, but it was very intense and almost gave up. But then I thought, heck if I can kick an addiction like smoking, I can do anything!! And I did ;0)

    Rogue~ Yeah, intense barely gets started on how I would describe it, and like I said before, I was ready to throw in the towel after day 2. My motivation to continue came from my marriage and where we are now compared to before DD. That is when I knew I had to continue.

    Princess xoxo

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  6. I like that you had to dig deep to get through it and you did! I don't think I'd want to go through it but I can see how it would be beneficial. Thanks for telling us a little about it. If my hubby ever gets the idea and suggests it, I'll come running for support!

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  7. Wow princess, submission comes easy for me and I don't think I would want to do this! I hate homework, and that is a lot of spankings. You totally rock though for sticking it out, and I imagine that was hard on your hubby to see you like that too.

    #TEAM PRINCESS#

    Mandy May<3

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  8. This was very insghtful, thank you for sharing. You are both very brave and congrats on making the boot camp work and coming out stronger for it.

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  9. Susie~ Lol Thanks:) It was kinda cool, and I'll be there if you ever come running girl!;)

    Mandy~ I envy the women that subission comes naturally for..seems like it would just make ttwd sooo much easier:)

    Tiffany~ Thanks:) and your welcome! You just never know who might benefit from sharing personal experiences, or who might just get what your going through:)

    Princess xoxo

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  10. hi Princess, wow thank you for sharing this. This is something I want to do and I think would benefit me and hubby so much - three days is a long time though - your poor bum :( but it sounds like it was so worth it.
    Id love to try this for us. I hope i get the chance to.
    You shared your experience very explicitly and articulately - thank you :)
    Love and hugs kiwi xxx

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  11. WOW! I know that is hard. Good for you both.

    I don't know if I could do it. Honestly I don't know if HE could do it, but I think it would be an interesting experience.

    I admire you both.

    Kelly

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  12. Kiwi~ I honestly don't know if I would recommend boot camp to others...it's that intense. Excellent communication, and 100% trust from both partners is an absolute must. If either of those things were missing, I could see things going wrong real quick. I'm glad I did it and I'm glad it's over~! If you ever do decide to do it, just make sure you two talk about everything and plan everything in advance to make sure you both know what to expect :)

    Kelly~ It was an interesting experience to say the least, and was no walk in the park. Like I told kiwi...I'm glad I did it... but I'm glad it's over!

    Princess xoxo

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  13. Ugg- I would just die, I'm sure- if Dev wanted to do bootcamp. Good for you tho, making it through and coming out stonger and more connected.

    P.S. I nominated you for the VBA

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  14. Just found your blog today and wanted to say how much I am enjoying it. You've had me smiling all morning....so much I can identify with! Hubby and I are new at this (started, stopped, just starting again) and it really helps to read what you gals have to say. Makes me feel almost normal. :)

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